Would You Rather...?

Long car trips are no fun. There are lots of games you can play while driving: I Spy, 20 Questions, or Slug Bug. For a road trip veteran like me, license plate spotting is the way to go. I have also had success with Would You Rather, which is very fun but also reveals way too much about your fellow roadtrippers. For instance, as a result of a game I played once on a road trip to a family Thanksgiving celebration, I now know way too much about my brother-in-law’s preferences regarding women’s shoes.

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That first game was played with an actual licensed Zoemondo! deck specifically for road tripping. You can find tons of lists of questions online, but when my brother texted me quite soon after he started a two hour drive yesterday, requesting that I “text me some would you rathers,” I shunned google in favor of my imagination.

“Would you rather eat cake or go hiking in Arizona?” This highly penetrating question was met with an ungrateful answer: “give me some that were not made up in 0.4 seconds.” They must not have understood that the question was situational. If I’m at a wedding reception, I want cake; hiking holds no interest for me. If I’m vacationing in the desert, then yes, let me put on some boots and grab some water and let’s go. Then when we get back we can have cake.

My next question, “Would you rather wear cowboy boots on the wrong feet every day or high heels every day?” was met with approval: “good one.” Obviously he and his friend revealed their inner feelings about footwear to one another and had a bonding experience.

I’m not sure how the probing question “Would you rather only eat bacon for the rest of your life or never eat bacon again?” was taken. They probably needed to do some soul searching, and so asked me for “some sexy ones,” so I provided this whopper: “Would you rather be a dog surrounded by hot ladies or a dude with no hot ladies at all?” and I was rewarded with the uplifting, “that was quite good, quite good.”

The only answer I got to my next question, “Would you rather high five everyone always and FOREVER or NEVER HIGH FIVE AGAIN???” was “yes,” so I’m sure my brother was trying to cheat the game and go for the happy medium, as high fives are a subject close to his heart.

“Would you rather dance in a helicopter or dance in a submarine?” was answered with, “do one about swimming pools.” So I complied with the disturbing,“Would you rather chill in a swimming pool or be hot in a swimming pool?”

After that I got a barrage of requests.

“Witches” were demanded. “Would you rather be a good witch with a puffy pink dress or a bad witch with awesome shoes?”

“Crane elevators” inspired, “Would you rather eat a crane elevator or pay for one?”

“Tar” led to the slightly biased, “Would you rather die in a tar pit or excavate a tar pit and study all the stuff that died there??? (Answer: history is fun!!)”

“Fish bones” produced, “Would you rather paint on fish bones or use them for cleaning your house?” and led my brother to finally give me some more feedback in the form of, “you’re a fish bone!”

The final request was “spaceships,” so I tempted their thirst for fame and pitted it against their curiosity and adventurous side: “Would you rather find a spaceship on land or find yourself spontaneously on a spaceship in space?”

Even though I didn’t get any answers to the questions I asked, I giggled myself silly writing them in the first place. I’m sure this is how the creators of the game felt.  My brother’s final text of the day was, “Thanks, we are almost there. You are the best sister I’ve ever had.” Even though I’m his only sister, I was touched. I dare the original games’ creators to get that kind of positive review.

I guess what I’ve learned from this experience is that I should design my own road trip game. Or at least they should hire me before I steal all their business.

Would you rather be on the road trip or entertaining everyone who is taking it?