Friday, October 18, 2013

How To Find Your Crafting Materials When You Want to Start a New Project

How To Find Your Crafting Materials When You Want to Start a New Project

There are a few things that you need to do before you can look for your crafting materials. First, they have to be lost. But not so lost that you can’t find them again. So make sure you put your crafting materials in a recognizable box: a brown one from Home Depot that has green words on it will do just fine. Make sure you write “CRAFTING STUFF” all over the outside of the box, and get a good picture in your mind of what this box looks like, so that even if you don’t know where it is, you always know what’s inside and what’s outside. Then, move across the country… twice, and forget about the box for a year or four.
Now you are ready to find your crafting materials in order to start a new project. The first step in this phase is to search for the box. The box will not be in any place that you look. It won’t be in that basement closet where you thought you put it. It won’t be in your closet (why are you even looking there?), it won’t even be on the floor of your kids’ closet (there’s way too much of their stuff in there for your crafts box to be there).
Then, go do something else. There are obviously more places to look, but you don’t want to get into them right now. That would necessitate cleaning out the hall closet, where you have been just throwing junk for the last year, and that’s not something you want to get into.
Wait about two months. Then sigh and go after that box.
Clean out the closet. Find a box cutter laying innocently where you could have cut yourself on it, then rearrange everything so it all fits and you can still have some walking room inside (or room to toss stuff all next year).
Hang on. You didn’t find the box?
Walk dejectedly into the living room and spot it sitting on a shelf in plain sight.
Congratulations. You have found the box and can now begin your new crafting project. But there is one more thing you have to do: glare at the box for being in plain sight and for wasting all that time you spent looking for it. It’s an inanimate object, you won’t hurt it’s feelings; it doesn’t have any feelings. And if it did, it’s probably laughing at you and so it deserves to get glared at.
Keep following this blog for more helpful How-Tos, including “How to Avoid Buying More Yarn (You Seriously Have Too Much Yarn)” and “How to Work on Many Crafting Projects at Once By Ignoring Them All Equally.”

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